#min.............. i love u min i miss u min :(
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yeahxsurexokay13 · 1 day ago
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wrong guy, lando norris
summary: fans think yn is dating max, but they've got the wrong guy [bsf!reader]
been a min since i posted! honestly, these just take me way too long and i usually end up abandoning them because i start hating them halfway through from overthinking lol. hope you enjoy this one though (: xx
y/n.y/l 📍 Ibiza, Spain
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Liked by riabish, carlossainz55 and 159.870 others
y/n.y/l we only argued 3 times, cried 2, and got lost 1 (personal record)
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user9 right so who argued? who cried? and most importantly whO IS THE SHADOW?
user14 can we talk about how u're LITERALLY glowing in that first pic? u look so happy, girl!!
user20 the vibes on this dump… rich people's holidays just hit different.
iamrebeccad ✓ Beautiful girl 😍
y/n.y/l 🫶🏼 miss youu!!
user4 “cried 2 times” is actually impressive ♥︎ by author
user55 lando and max just casually being brothers in the fourth pic 😩❤️
user81 that shot is just *chef’s kiss*!!!! Glad we can always count on this queen for hq content
user63 Okay so I’ve been staring at this shadow pic for like 10 minutes, and I can’t figure it out…
user33 my money’s on max bc that hug pic of them earlier too… feels very coupley.
user63 idk friends to lovers agenda thriving tho
user3 Max and Lando with the face masks are killing me 😂 ♥︎ by author
user6 max or lando? place your bets now. i’m team max but i’ll die on this hill if i'm wrong
user2 which you are, because it’s definitely Lando
user8 guys they’ve literally known each other since forever and go on these friends holidays all the time lmao this is just FRIENDSHIP GOALS. stop romanticising everything!!!
user24 then explain the head kiss?
user8 friendly head kisses???
user24 friendly kisses?? in this economy? be serious. that’s couple behaviour
user12 smells like a third wheel in here…
y/n.y/l sorry, that's just me. i am the third wheel🙋🏼‍♀️
user13 she really said 'stop shipping me with my best friends' lol
user44 max and lando with the face masks in the water might be my new favourite photo of all time
user16 ngl that's not bad statistics for a week long trip ♥︎ by author
user11 If it’s Max, I’ll cry. If it’s Lando, I’ll cry harder. If it’s neither, I don’t know what I’ll do.
user18 i’ve been following these three for years and i’m still trying to figure out if that last slide is supposed to be romantic or not….? HELP I AM SO CONFUSED
user22 what book is that? i need recommendations!!
y/n.y/l just for the summer!!! LOVED it x
user10 i can’t believe she was so chill about posting thAT LAST PIC!??!! miss y/l!!! SPILL NOW
maxfewtrell ✓ Why are you saying 'we'? Pretty sure you were the one who did all of those
landonorris ✓ classic move, shifting the blame
y/n.y/l @/landonorris @/maxfewtrell the getting lost part was definitely a team effort
user1 I need to go on a trip with friends like this ♥︎ by author
user5 being that close to lando AND max and surviving the friendship without catching feelings was too good to be true let's be honest
pietra.pilao 😍😍
y/n.y/l 💞💞
user7 so when’s the next ‘friends holiday'? asking for a friend (me)
15 August 2024
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maxfewtrell ✓
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Liked by landonorris, y/n.y/l and 98.982 others
maxfewtrell The real girlfriend reveal, for the record 🫡
👤 pietra.pilao
view all 398 comments
user1 WAIT WHAT
user6 so it really wasn’t Y/n??
pietra.pilao ❤️❤️ ♥︎ by author
user4 omg she's the girl who commented on yn's holiday dump!!!
user3 We owe Max and his gf an apology 😭 She’s stunning, btw
user2 omg u two are so cuteeeeeeee! happy for u max :)
user5 your gf is so pretty 😭😭😭
y/n.y/l P!!!! 💕💕
y/n.y/l you two make a better couple than you and I ever would anyway 😂 ♥︎ by author
user9 WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY THIS EARLIER?! we’ve been spiralling for WEEKS
user12 actually he's been saying it from the beginning. we just didn't want to listen 😂😂
user8 max: “here’s my gf. leave me out of y/n’s business”
user12 OK but pietra is STUNNING!! Max, you’ve been hiding her for how long?!
user7 the way he had to clarify this because of us is actually hilarious. sorry, Max.
user11 OMG I feel so dumb now we really had y/n in a whole relationship she wasn’t even in 😭
29 August 2024
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y/n.y/l
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Liked by oscarpiastri, sophiaaemelia and 289.034 others
y/n.y/l outtakes from ai·bee·thuh
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user1 AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!?? MYSTERY SOLVED IG
user12 I THINK THIS MIGHT BE THE GREATEST THING TO HAPPEN TO MY FEED THIS YEAR I AM NOT EVEN JOKING
maxfewtrell ✓ So Lando gets the cute video and I get the passed out in the car pic? Playing favourites, I see. Noted.
user8 Max calling out Y/n for favoritism is peak sibling energy
user33 i can't believe we were full on shipping them not even a week ago omg
maxfewtrell ✓ Also, can everyone stop tagging me in that shadow pic now? Like, I’m good, it’s definitely not me 😅 ♥︎ by author
user11 pietra honestly deserves a medal for surviving this holiday with these three omg
user17 GUYS I WAS ALREADY PRETTY SHOCKED AT LANDO'S VIDEO BLOWING A KISS I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I HAD COMING
pietra.pilao Special week 🤍 ♥︎ by author
user81 the lift photo with the McDonald’s bag is so relatable. even on a fancy holiday, you gotta have your nuggets ♥︎ by author
user25 turns out Max wasn't lying when he said y/n wasn’t his headache... lando’s the lucky one 😂
user10 and y/n and pietra? they do ✨besties ✨ better than anyone ♥︎ by author
user19 can we get a ‘whoops, my bad’ from the ppl who saw them in Ibiza and STILL missed the fact that Pietra was there?
user2 they literally had a front row seat to the full gossip and still didn’t catch on !!!!! like hELLO? u had one job
user14 THE SOFT LAUNCH TURNED INTO A HARD LAUNCH REAL QUICK I AM SHOOK
alexandrasaintmleux ✓ Ahhh loveeee 🩷🩷 ♥︎ by author
user26 both boys punching above their weight fr. i said what i said.
francisca.cgomes ✓ ❤️❤️😍 ♥︎ by author
user16 The way Max is sleeping in that last pic has me wheezing ♥︎ by author
user3 lando is literally holding y/n like he’s never letting her go boy is WHIPPED
user29 WE'RE GOING TO SEE "LANDO NORRIS' PARTNER" UNDER YN'S NAME NOW WHEN SHE WATCHES FROM THE GARAGE what a time to be alive
user7 not the way y/n is casually posting a McDonald’s bag in a robe and THEN dropping the most beautiful couple pic with lando
user5 waIT SO THE BOY KISSING HER HEAD IN THE SHADOW PIC WAS LANDO??? WE WERE ALL WRONG. I NEED TO LIE DOWN.
maxfewtrell you know, it truly baffles me how this was barely even considered
y/n.y/l no one believed in me enough to be able to pull f1 race winner lando norris. humbling.
user20 YN I - 😭😭😭😭💀💀
user38 it was a couple’s holiday the whole time 😭😭 I need a moment to recover
user9 this fandom’s clownery knows no bounds istg.........
user21 not me crying over the hard launch of the year when I was just admiring Max’s sleeping face 5 seconds ago
user24 Ibiza really gave us everything: friendship goals, couple goals, and max in a food coma
user18 IT WAS LANDO KISSING HER HEAD. I feel so betrayed by my own theories and also pretty disappointed in myself i couldn't tell it was his shadow
landonorris ✓ I see you saved the best for last 🖤
y/n.y/l ☺️☺️
y/n.y/l omg guys i wasn’t being dry i just don’t know what else to say with all you watching 😭😭
1 September 2024
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gomzdrawfr · 11 hours ago
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The night was quiet as the Captain stepped out into the open air, fresh out from a mission, the sharp chill of the morning bit at his skin but he hardly noticed due to the exhaustion. The sky was dark, save for the faint halo of the light from the idling helicopter in the distance, painting the floor and wall in hues of turquoise.
There he was, Nikolai.
He leaned casually against the aircraft, a cigarette dangling loosely between his fingers, one foot propped, his broad shoulders relaxed. His jacket was unzipped just enough to reveal a teasing glimpse of his chest and all the hairy goodness beneath.
Even from a distance, Price could see the way Nik’s eyes were fixed on him.
Always waiting. Always there. Always steadfast. Just like he always had been. 
The first few snowflakes drifted slowly from the sky, mixing with the faint fog of Nikolai’s breath curling in the air and the smoke from his cigarette. Nik looked hot—there was no other word for it.
Okay, maybe there were few more words to describe the love of his life, but John couldn’t give a single bollock digging through the dictionary now. Not when Nik was standing there with his arms crossed, black hair slicked back yet slightly tousled. He looked like he belonged on the cover of one of those old male model magazines he’d been caught sneaking glances at in secret.
Something giddy and nearly childish bubbled in John’s chest, like spotting a bright candy from afar, something precious you’ve waited for your entire life. Before he knew it, he began walking. Boots crunched against the concrete beneath each step as his hands moved almost automatically, shrugging his helmet off, letting it fall to the ground with no care as his walk turned into a small jog, then a run. 
His goal was clear: to kiss his hot pilot husband.
By the time he reached Nik, his breath was shallow and his chest was heaving with something that wasn’t exertion, excitement maybe, but he stopped just short, his gaze lifting to meet Nik’s. 
Price paused, just for a second. He always did, right? Even after all this time, after a hundred kisses and then some, Price always had that fleeting moment of hesitation. A combination of gratitude, love and guilt stirred inside his chest. Nik had always waited, even now, through all the years it took John to come around, to gently removing and breaking down his defenses brick by brick, until he’d finally admitted what they both knew was inevitable. 
But tonight, John thought it wasn’t the nerves holding him back.
It was the way Nik was looking at him, staring at him like he was the centre of the universe, with those dark eyes softened and the corner of his eyes crinkled with adoration. The kind of look that had John’s knees buckled, the kind of look that screamed worship, that he was enough, that he was loved for exactly who he was. 
For Nik, he was roaming his eyes around John, observing the way the snowflakes gathered around John’s hair, blending with the white strands already there, the way they aligned and caught in the faint light made it shimmer like constellations, presenting John- his husband, in an otherworldly look. It was as if every star and planet had aligned to bring the John Price here, shaped from stardust gathered from the debris of the abyss and sent John crashing into his heart like a meteor.
If Nikolai too, could see himself as one of the stars in a galaxy of thousands, colliding with John to create the brightest supernova, perhaps then, he could erase the darker thoughts that lingered behind his love.
Nikolai had always thought himself akin to the black hole, pulling everything he loved into himself, consuming it with a selfish, unrelenting hunger. It was, and still is, a daily struggle to fight the unforgiving part of himself that believed he wasn’t worthy of Price. 
Nik leaned down slightly, nudging his nose against John’s, hearing the faint hitch in John’s breath, the reaction that always pulled a smile to his lips. The way Nik moved his nose to John’s cheek was slow and intimate, pressing lightly into the softness of the skin. Even as Nikolai can feel the way John breathed him in, the faint tang of ash and smoke with a mix of engine oil, the smell that reminded John something of warmth, of home, Nikolai still couldn’t quite shake off the pang of guilt. 
Nikolai wanted John wholly, completely, all of him, and that weight of need and want felt almost cruel. To love someone so much that it physically hurt, to want someone to the point of selfishness–it was hauntingly beautiful and unbearable at the same time. 
“Kissing under the first snow of the year,” Nik murmured, the cigarette between his fingers sizzled and forgotten, his voice rough with affection and a hint of the usual tease, batting off the uneasiness of his heart with humor, “like boys in a love story…звезда моя”. John huffed, rolling his eyes as his cheeks burned, a cute shade of red dusting his skin like apples. Nik almost cooed when the snowflake landed on his cheek melted away instantly, the heat of his embarrassment clear as day.
John didn’t bother responding, wanted to kiss Nik stupid as he leaned forward. Yet, as their lips were barely brushing and their eyes closed, the moment dissolved into something softer. Their breaths mingled, warm against their cold skin, and when they finally closed the distance–the kiss was slow and tender, like they were learning how to kiss all over again, and their worries faded away like the snow melting on the ground. 
Nik kissed the same way he loved, completely, boundlessly, consuming, and John allowed himself to be swallowed whole, to be taken completely by the gravity of Nik’s affection.
Because if there was any man that John would start a war for–even a cosmic one at that, it would always be him, and only him, his Nikolai. 
When they finally pulled back, with more snowflakes gathered around their head and their foreheads pressed together. Nik breathed out a quiet chuckle, “you’re blushing, John.”
John groaned, shaking his head, voice low yet filled with fondness. “Cheeky as ever, Nik.”
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Merry Christmas Nekros!! I hope you like this lil present I wrote based on the breathtaking art :D special thanks to my friends and @karlachismylife for the help and inspiration :) ho ho ho to the nikprice community too!!
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Returning from an op and immediately running to kiss your hot pilot husband under the first snow of the year 🌨️🚁
#shaking as I schedule this#HAHA#im so sorry for the small bits of angst in there i couldn't help myself with these two....pain is wovened into their very beings#i decided to take a twist to focus the yearning and the pain that comes with loving someone whole on Nikolai this time#was this bcuz of Father's hypothermia fic yes maybe KAJSHDK and also how I saw you relate to Nik most time#forgive me for any grammar or mistakes there#can you tell I love stars? and space? I do - i love them a lot esp seeing the way your art reminds me of them#despite its about snow#my fav part of writing this was looking at your art on my other tab to solidify the vibes#you know what was my fav? the way you drew Nik's nose squishing gently into Price's cheek#which was something Ive missed on my first reblog#and I knew I had to put that in the writing somewhere and make it meaningful#bcuz every stroke every line and every painting/art you do are meaningful in their own ways - even if you struggle to like them#there was a line for the nose thing that I couldn't wedge it in so here's the sentence#Nik pressed into his skin with a heavy feeling in his chest that felt like worship - like he was allowing himself to grace upon smtg sacred#The softness of John was a privilege granted to no one else but him - and he wondered again how he could dare to claim something-#so achingly tender - precious - soft all to himself and how John became so vulnerable and unyielding under his hands despite everything#*slams fist on the table repeatedly* Nik ya dumb fUCK HE'S YOUR HUSBAND STOP DOUBTING YA PRETTY LIL HEAD#anyways#!!! love u bud !!! cant wait for this post to go live and read your reaction hehe#also isn't it crazy this whole thing could've just been a few mins thing but it felt like it was more of that?#love makes time freeze on its spot#merry christmas#nikprice#prikolai#captain john price#nikolai cod#captain price#john price#gummmythoughts
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idliketobeatree · 5 months ago
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painland week, day 3 : first kiss/confession of love "i knew you truly loved me, as i loved you, when everything swam in blue."
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jkvjimin · 5 months ago
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pouty lips and :] yoongi for @yooboobies ♡ cr. namuspromised
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fisherrprince · 1 year ago
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mmm… noodle….
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bansheenolan · 2 years ago
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missing scenes i deserved: nolan’s beast trauma
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deus-ex-mona · 5 months ago
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such is the tale of a ✨chronically online hypocrite✨
#(please forgive this old folk’s rambling for a hot min bc i need to get this off my chest somehow and in some way)#tl;dr: come and get into the hw idol series!!! we have ship discourse; more ship discourse; even more ship discourse#(yes ik people should be free to ship what they do b u t claiming a noncanon ship as canon and forcing it on everyone else is. not cool.)#yes yes friday’s mv was visually cute and ino.rin’s singing was peak b u t i feel like it has caused more harm than good in some way???#i cant b e l i e v e the jp hwtwt beef over friday’s mv is still going on mannnnnnnnn#no less than 3 separate people have made posts along the lines of#‘p l s stop using [official tags] to post about *[unnamed] non-official ships* p l s there’s a time and place for everything’#and n o n e of them even remotely run in the same circles yet they’re all banded together against a *certain* group lmfao never change hwtwt#lhy (esp yhy) shippers are always at the scene of the crime mannnnnnn#i cant see anything on their end of the naval battle (has every single lhy tag+account that i could think of blocked)#b u t it’s still really funny to witness on my twtdash against my will. i think i need to touch grass#‘kyhn isn’t canon either so why do you like it while being such a hater towards lhy—‘#great question!!!!!! it’s bc (disregarding the movie) they actually interact really well together~~~ like the honeypre event y k—#and also bc yukki treats hina really nicely all the time (even when she was being tsun and literally running from her feelings for him)#a n d hina loved him for who he truly was; even before his image change arc. and she also does her best to appeal to him and such~~~~~~~#but lhy. uh. they just bully hiyo 95% of the time and while they do look out for her bc they’re pals#they’re just pals. guys. and lxl have gone ‘uwu it must be u uwu’ to each other one too many times so shoehorning hiyo between them would.#be pretty weird ngl? esp since the ‘widely accepted’ portrayal of lhy as a trio is p much just hiyo x 2 dudes who dont even like each other#and. like. a branch of such portrayals usually seem to have aizo waft away from the ‘r/s triad’ to date mona instead which is. very weird.#some people just pick and choose aizo and mona interactions dont they. all they see is the umbrella scene and go ‘ah yes. canon’#they dont even read further to see how mona doesn’t even use the umbrella after aizo leaves (clear rejection)#a n d how aizo doesn’t even remember giving the umbrella to mona + mona’s entire existence in general after that#and that’s not even counting the grudge mona refuses to let go of even after what looks to be literal months#so for certain shippers to just casually shoo aizo out of the hiyoharem and into mona’s unwilling arms for the sake of yhy is. weird.#and like. shouldn’t he and yujiro have a say in this?? they’re more interested in each other than hiyo so just how are they being commonly#portrayed as hiyosimps in fanon? im so confused… like. wouldn’t they be equally obsessed with each other (as w/ hiyo) if they were a rstrio?#aaaaaa get this off my twtdash plsssssssss pls see this post twtapp pls let this affect your dumb algorithm im tired of the ship discourseee#as funny as the ‘lhy vs the world’ naval warfare is it’s getting. um. very annoying!!!! and now im missing nagisa more than ever s o b s#plsplsplsplsplsplsplsplspls influence the algorithm ragepost; ik big brother is 👀watching👀 so do your thing—#(pls feel free to duke it out with me too if y’all read this i need my birdsite algorithm to le a r n that i dont wanna see stuff like this)
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intertexts · 3 months ago
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ROSSSSS ok. yhesterday u asked for like details and habits and skills nhw virion would have picked up from the greats and theyre still living in my head Rent Fucking Free so im gonna throw some stuff in ur inbox bc i want 2 talk abt them SO BAD
ok so strider definitely contributed to virion’s paranoia. thats just. yeah. he didn’t really Mean To it just kind of Happened. bro did not realize that saying “keep your eye out for anything or anyone when you’re out alone on the streets because if someone Can hurt you, they Will” would scare a kid into being Perpetually Anxious!!!! virion definitely looks over his shoulder like every ten seconds whenever he’s out, even if he’s not in costume, bc strider drilled that into his head. Always Be Cautious Always Be On Your Toes!!!! strider also taught him basic street fighting. showed him how to fight dirty!! virion does tend to carry around a few concealed weapons and he started doing that because of strider
meanwhile chungus (i love u chungus ur name is so fucking stupid) taught virion how to fight fair!!! i’m still working on chungus’s backstory and trigger event but i like to think he was a wrestler and/or boxer in school, so he taught virion the Rules of fighting, how to take down an opponent without really hurting them, how to take down people who are heavier and bigger than him, etc. it’s not knowledge that virion uses a lot but in fights with no weapons he still automatically goes into Proper Boxer Fighting Stance. also he has totally accidentally put someone in a headlock because of instincts when they’ve snuck up on him
greyson!! greyson taught virion how to hold all manners of weapons. daggers swords shields you name it!! not really because greyson thought it would be particularly useful, just mostly for fun bc no way this kid is ever going to need to use these!! he got a lot more little habits from greyson tho, like stuff he doesn’t really notice but it is from greyson. he taps his fingers on his arm when he’s impatient, picks at the skin around his nails, stuff like that. he also knows a lot about medieval weaponry bc greyson liked to infodump and virion Absorbed that knowledge. will sometimes find himself going on tangents about how catapults were used in the 1500’s if the topic somehow comes up but he will shut the fuck up once he realizes what he’s doing and gets reminded of greyson and suddenly feels Bad and Horrible at the reminder. yeagh
min did try to teach him stuff but there wasn’t much she knew that she thought would be super useful. she was learning math and physics in college before leviathan hit her hometown, but virion was never really one for academics!!! but he did try to listen to her on the rare occasions she talked about it. he picked up more little habits from her, like he chews on things like his hoodie strings or even his hair when he’s thinking really hard, she taught him how to braid hair and he’ll find himself copying how she braided his sometimes when he’s messing with ashe’s hair, and whenever he’s holding a pen he clicks it really fast like a million times before he even does anything with it. keep his ass out of school he cannot pick up a math or physics textbook without thinking about min and he will think about her the entire class
RAMMM ILY RAM..... he taught virion how to hold guns. any gun he could think of ram was like okay i gotta teach this kid how to shoot and handle this thing correctly and safely. btw i decided ram’s trigger event was him and some friends being stupid in college and playing drunken russian roulette. u can imagine!!! how well that went!!! i wanted to make his sudden innate Knowledge about guns be horribly ironic and also painful for him <3 so now he’s fucking Insistent that virion learn how to handle guns and how to Know when they’re loaded and to ALWAYS KNOW WHERE THE BULLET IS. VERY IMPORTANT. whenever virion’s handling a gun he Always makes sure he knows how many bullets he has left, where his ammo is, never leave the safety off when he puts it down, etc etc. Very Persistent with gun safety. ram has also drilled it into his head to never drink when holding weapons. actually very insistent that virion Never Drink Ever actually. also his southern mannerisms rubbed off on virion juussssst a little bit. virion calls wibby “darlin” once and william has a heart attack over it. virion doesn’t even realize he’s doing it!!! he says ain’t and y’all sometimes and doesn’t even notice until one of the other wards points it out and asks why and virion has an internal breakdown about it
ALPHONZ..... MY LOVE...... i think. for the first little bit after joining the greats, alphonz was in his breaker state A Lot and was not able to get out of it half the time. so in virion’s early life, he just has memories of this bright glowing angel-lookin guy in the room whenever he was around the greats. out of his breaker state tho!! alphonz tried to teach virion religion for a bit, but virion’s parents managed to convince alphonz to leave it alone because if virion wanted to go down that path someday he’d find it on his own, etc etc yk and alphonz eventually conceded. he did read bible stories to virion as bedtime stories though!! virion thought they were fun little fiction stories, and also alphonz’s voice was just nice to fall asleep to, so his parents didn’t mind. to this day virion can probably still recite like half the bible from memory. he doesn’t believe in god but maybe he’s got like. an old cross necklace that alphonz gave him once and he wears it under his shirt sometimes like in memory of alphonz. he chews on the pendant sometimes—thanks min for the chewing stim!!!—and the metal has small scratches and teeth marks. if the chain ever breaks or he loses the pendant he will lose his mind
ANYWAY. YEAH. THIS TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO TYPE OUT IM SO SORRY FOR PUTTING A NOVEL IN YIOUR INBOX. THEY’RE JUST. LIVING IN MY HEAD RENT FREE RN. BRAIN IS SOUP. THINKING ABOUT NHW GREATS. U KNOW HOW IT IS
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AUGH............................
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bibleofficial · 15 days ago
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realized my ‘soup’ that i ‘invented’ is just. daal. humans will always reinvent the wheel
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#stream#like#i guess it’s a stew ?#girl i was thinking ‘girl kp [indian friend that taught me what spices to mix & also that u can eat … carbs … e.g. rice lentil whatever … w#literally anything & also raid [ethiopian friend that FORCES ME TO EAT IM NOT EVEN KIDDING he’s so fucking funny like that’s not even#related to the ethiopian that’s just being a Normal Person bc it’s usually Not Normal for friends to compare w each other how many times#each have been witness to me literally eating#ALSKALSKALSKALSKLAKSLAKSLAKSLA I HATE EATING#but raid omg he told me about this ethiopian lentil sauce he tells me how to cook E V E R Y T H I N G & how to SPICE THINGS omg he’s a pro#& he can EXPLAIN & i’m a sponge … infinite inspirations them both] have impacted my cooking irreparably’#also this chinese woman who makes short 3 min videos + shorts sometimes that explains everything soooo simply i mean it’s translated#subtitles but she’s soooo thorough i love her videosssss ‘cut into ur favourite shape :)’ it’s just 😭😭😭❤️❤️ MY fav shape ??? i think it’s a#‘too literal translation’ but i still love it#not the point#i mean yenzhe got me on the chinese cooking immediately bc i just harass him like what are u cooking how did u cook that what did u use#kinggggggg he’s been so SUPPORTIVE & ENABLING 😭😭 ugh miss him when is chinese new year next#or chinese independence when’s that idk i rly need to see how much it costs to ship shit to china
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f-rg-tmigej · 17 days ago
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Himlen bar dig hela vägen upp i ljuset när den hämtade dig.
Ändå saknar jag dig fortfarande till tårar. Jag, vi tänker på dig varje, varje dag. Det gör ont när invanda mönster om din existens lurar mig en microsekund att du ska finnas där.
Inatt gör det riktigt jävla ont, livet, allt.
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mer-se · 23 days ago
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um today is so fucking weird
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pleasedontcareaboutme · 2 months ago
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i think i finally realized why ive been feeling so damn depressed lately again
sorry for writing this here. im really hurting actually. im not good. i feel a bit helpless too. idk who to talk to bc i dont want to burden anyons and i donf feel like anything could console me right now
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Like. fuck me man. thanks for saving me but. why the hell are you not here. i dont want to do this without you. i hate only being able to remember you. i was supposed to grow old with you, not without you.
And. honestly. even with all this bullshit i say here, all the endless times i spend trying to write down my feelings, abt you, about all the pain ive felt my life, it doesnt get better. not at all. and no words, no poetry takes it away and i truly feel like nobody will ever truly understand how suffocated i felt all my life.
and i want to change thanks to you but. i dont know. nothing's satisfying enough.
no matter what, i truly only feel great when im in that daydream like world you created.
and these past days ive been thinking a lot that. i really wouldnt mind dying right now. not at all. because at least i know what happiness feels like. and i want to stay in that state. probably, even in this life your music will bring me happiness, but i want to be trapped in it.
im tired of being so unseen, and even when im seen, im hurting. but i dont know whats hurting. i think im just really tired thats all.
and. ye. i feel brave tbh. i still havent posted my video to instagram, bc im not brave for that. i dont know. and i feel like a hypocrite bc everything is true that i wrote there but at the same time these are my thoughts currently
in a long while i looked up suicide methods again. i feel so hopeful, but im not really sure if really for the future. jm sorry this is probably alarming. i will probably not kill myself but. idk. im not sure actually. i dknt know what to say. i wasnt cut out for this wordly shit.i feel unlovable but even if im loved, i donf want to be. i dont want anything. just let me stsy in this quiet place snd just. disappear. i wouldnt want my family to hurt if i die but i wont know about it anyways. idk man. i feel strongly i could die calmly this time and thats nice. bc 6 years ago i was terrified, and hurt. but now im content and kind of ready idk man. its not a terrible feeling, its a "this is it, it was nice while it lasted" ig.
there are no clouds in my head actually. i truly dont feel like im thinking irrationally, i feel like this would just be like. the end goal i was looking for. to feel true love once. it was nice.
no goodbye yet bc idk how id kms even if i do. But ill tell u guys if i found something.
#you know it's funny#i still feel this way but the moment i wrote this#on tiktok one of my friends that was there for most of my times followed my secret tiktok account and#the friend that i lost last year checked my account and#i hope she fucking knows how much that means to me#because i always felt like she hstes me but i still deeply feel she cares abf me and silently looks out for me and i feel so sorry#bc in the past 4 days she has checked my account multiple times and idk man#i truly feel like she sees that im struggling i appreciate it a lot#but i could never tell her that because what if im wrong and also#i dont fit in that friendship anymore#but im still really greatful#for checking up on me even like this#*most of my life#noticed a typo#idk anyways i just really needed to scream this into the void. I didn't want to be so sad today. i just scrolled instagram to numb myself#all day. but i got off my phone it was terrible. idk. i feel im not sure i can get my shit together by monday#im sick of having to fall apart and build myself up every fucking day man. and each day i literally wake up telling myself affirmations#trying to convince myself that its oka#it will be okay at least when u are home at night. wait for that moment everyday but. im tired of waiting for night to be happy man.#i have 30 mins to either post that fuckin video and make a fool of myself bc i told myself i need to post it on the 19th. but idk man. Im#terrified it will only disappoint me. people will make fun of me. idk man. its not that funny is it. or is it? how pathetic i am for clingi#g to the only hope in my life like a fucking abandoned dog man. but what can i do. i dont want to depend on you so much. but then who shoul#i depend on? if i depend on myself im just gonna kill myself man.idk. my grief is getting worse day by day. i still practice guitar everyda#hoping that maybe you will come back or something will come back. maybe mywill to live will come back? maybe the Instrument will play a not#that I can depend on? i dont really know what im looking for thats the worst. living is uncomfortable and dark. even when im smiling with m#friends i feel lost.there's something i feel like they know and i dont. when they could name their favorite colors in kindergarten i alread#knew something was different abt me.its really isolating.not having a clue of who am i.i keep saying im finding myself more and more but tb#i still in a way like im always wearing a costume. i wonder how naked id have to be to find myself. sorry for word vomitting.it maybe helps#anyways acchan i miss you.this world feels really stale without you.i wish I could truly show how much I love you with my words or life but#i dont really think it makes a difference.my voice really doesnt matter that much in the end.maybe im too much
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kn11ves · 1 year ago
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i just saw someone call oroc himaru morally grey ill eat us both alive he litearlly stole babies so he could commit as many experiemtsn on them as possible he probably was eating people in his dinky ass lab what do u mean morally grey i mean hes litearlly pronouns so i like him what are u on about tho
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andypantsx3 · 2 years ago
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🚨guys mermie's work is in a podcast!! 🚨
Anchor: http://bit.ly/3qFZjww Spotify: http://spoti.fi/2YhCQtL Apple: http://apple.co/3auXXy4
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ronanlynchbf · 1 year ago
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put that sucker on 1.5x speed ☝️🙏👆👍❗❗❗
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jennifersminds · 1 year ago
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rewatching ouat for the first time in like four years guys i’m so excited
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